Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
