Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
