do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i just google imaged poop.
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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