Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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