you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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