Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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