Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
