I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Nicole vs. Life
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize