pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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