Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
