I feel like I'm in dance class right now
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i think my mom watched the whole time
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
