Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
