I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
