He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
