Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
