I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Do vagina's smell?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
