Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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