did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize