you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
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