you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
