dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
