Where is the hickey?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
