But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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