my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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