Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Randomize
