Cold hands, warm shart.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
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