Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
someone owes me an orgasm
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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