similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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