I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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