Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
