boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
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