Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I touched a dick in church today
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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