you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
either way he was missing a nipple.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
