I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
She's the barista slut.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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