is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
