once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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