Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
