Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
You were trust falling into bushes
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
