No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
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