Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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