I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
