I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
where does the pee come out of this thing
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
