In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
he shaved USA in his pubs
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize