Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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