I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
