K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
