My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
