Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
My dick has a subreddit
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
