I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
