Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize